Journal Entry 5-28-02

And then you realize it. There’s no one left to talk to. You’ve alienated everyone. Old friends want nothing to do with you. Those heightened arguments you had were too much for them. The highs and lows were too much.

Running. Just running wild. Driving all over the place. One day in New England and then over night you wind up in Dixie somewhere at a rest area on I-95. And you’re yelling at no one. There’s no one left to yell at. That paranoia of everyone out to get you has done permanent damage. Bridges burned.

The high lasts for weeks, sometimes months. And then you crash. Burned out. A depression sets in. You realize what you’ve done. Sadness. Sheer sadness. There’s two options; end it, or, go to the hospital. These are the choices on a daily basis. Choose wisely.

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