Finally, I’m in New York with seven hundred dollars on me; kept in my front pocket due to paranoia, the wallet in my back pocket is obsolete, I pretend it’s not there.

The bills are rolled in a thick wad; more money than I’ve had at one time in my life; thank you, Thomas Schmidt. You are a Saint. Or, a fool. Me? I’m simply lost. Lost spiritually, morally,  and physically. I have no idea where I am.

I used to want to help people,  maybe save their souls, but now I just want more and more and more at the cost of nothing. Don’t judge me. This is America at its best. The leaching of our fellow man. For Christ’s sake, we’re taught it in Bible school. We are told that our sins are forgiven if you just believe. Well, I believe….I believe.

Times Square is an adult porno paradise filled with perverts and pimps, whores and dope dealers, speed freaks and junkies, businessmen in suits, all clamoring for the same thing, women, transexuals,  transvestites, domanitrixes, glory holes, and peep shows. We are all in this together. But we are not all as one. Different people with different kinks about them. Some will survive while others die in gutters.

Few cities of America offer this on such a grand scale. New Yorkers are lucky. It’s right at their fingertips, just a jerk or a suck or a fuck away from dreams coming true. It is really quite something. The spectacular does not do it justice. It is sin on a grand scale. It’s a poker game if you will. And I’m cashing in all my chips.